Thursday, December 6, 2012

Closer

Oh my gosh, I've lost my edge.
I used to work 18 hours at a sitting.
I used to stay up til 2 am and then be up again at 6.
I used to put in my mind that I needed to have "x" number of something
and not give up til I accomplished it.
There was no compromise in that.
I was driven.


And I was fairly productive.
When I think about the sheer number of things that I have created over the years,
I get tired.


In 1998 when I started sculpting,
I took orders in June for over 170 pieces that had to be done by October.
Craziness.
The following year, it was 260 orders.
Yes. Insane.


At the time, I also had 4 children at home, an elderly and ailing father
and was involved in a number of organizations.
And yet I produced.
Lots.


It's not that I'm not working seriously now.
I am.
But I don't work weekends.
And I don't work nights.
And I don't start at 6 am.
And I say far more than I ever did ...
"I'll do that tomorrow."


I jog rather than sprint.
Whether that is the aging process ... 
physically or mentally
I don't know.
But it's okay.
It's a very peaceful spot to be.


Uncharacteristically peaceful.


I should have had these creations finished weeks ago.
I should have had them listed at the beginning of last week.
Well, actually, I should have had them listed in October.
I didn't.
But, it's getting closer.


I think maybe tomorrow.


Yes. Tomorrow.

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